Ben Duckett’s first innings since his Noosa outing made the headlines was over in a flash as England struggled in reply to Australia’s 152 all out on a dramatic opening day in Melbourne. Duckett had made just two when he was dismissed in horrible fashion, caught off a leading edge at mid-on off the bowling of Mitchell Starc, to take his tally in this series to 99 runs at 14.
That set in motion a horror collapse, with Jacob Bethell edging Michael Neser to Alex Carey for a single in his first innings of the tour after replacing Ollie Pope, and Zak Crawley fiddling Starc to second slip for five.
And it was 16 for four when Joe Root played forward to Neser and was caught behind for a 15-ball duck, his second nought of the series. By the drinks break of the final session, England were 39 for four.
Tongue the man of the morning
Earlier, England’s hero with the ball in the first half of the day had been Josh Tongue, who picked up a career-best five for 45, and will begin Australia’s second innings on a hat-trick after removing Michael Neser and Scott Boland with the last two deliveries of Australia’s first.
Three of his victims had come before lunch after Ben Stokes won an important toss on a green-tinged pitch that offered lavish seam movement throughout. Jake Weatherald was strangled down the leg side for 10 to continue his mediocre series, before Marnus Labuschagne was suckered into a loose drive, and was caught at first slip by Root on six.
But Tongue’s highlight came when he speared one back through the gate, as Steve Smith aimed something wild through the off side, and departed for nine.
England’s hero with the ball in the first half of the day had been Josh Tongue, who picked up a career-best five for 45 and will begin Australia’s second innings on a hat-trick
Smith left Tongue-tied
As Smith never tires of pointing out, he has never been dismissed by Jofra Archer, a record that will still be intact by the end of this series following Archer’s withdrawal because of a side strain. But Tongue? That’s another matter entirely: this was the fifth time he has taken his wicket in the five innings in which he has bowled to him.
First came a county championship match between Worcestershire and Sussex at New Road in 2023 (Smith lbw b Tongue 30), then the Lord’s Ashes Test (Smith c Duckett b Tongue 110 and Smith c Crawley b Tongue 34). At Cardiff in August, during the Hundred, it was Smith c Buttler b Tongue 26. But Smith b Tongue 9 at the MCG on Boxing Day is the most memorable moment yet.
England’s festive upgrade
England’s Christmas lunch at Melbourne’s Hyatt, the team hotel, was a vast improvement on what confronted them four years ago during the Covid Ashes. Then, they ended up at the Sandbar on Middle Beach in the suburb of St Kilda, where – according to Stuart Broad on the For Love of Cricket podcast – ‘it was almost as if the staff went: “We’ve forgotten the food here.”’
The food consisted of a buttered roll, processed ham and turkey, and no plates. Broad said: ‘Stokesey quickly went from finding it quite funny to then realising that this is his pre-match meal for his preparation to perform and he was like: “I’m not having this, what is going on?!”’
This time, a touring party that included family members and numbered three figures were treated to what one insider described as ‘the best Christmas meal we’ve ever had’, with Australian seafood, pan-Asian curries and English roasts all on the menu.
An unexpected ally
England’s now-infamous Noosa trip has received the empathy Ben Stokes was calling for from an unlikely source. Asked about the reaction to England’s holiday break, Steve Smith – who knows a thing or two about being in the eye of a media storm – replied: ‘When you’re losing the spotlight’s always on you. Things can get spoken about and get blown up pretty heavily. I feel for them in a way.
‘It can be tricky. You’re in a country where you go out and about and enjoy yourselves. And with big breaks, you’ve got to experience the country you’re in as well. They had a pretty big break in between, and sometimes you’ve got to get away from the game and try to put it out of your mind and relax a little bit too. I can see that was the path they wanted to go down.
‘I think it’s fair enough. I can’t really comment more than that on how they’re feeling, but I believe that when you’ve lost two Test matches and have such a big break, sometimes you’ve got to get away from the game and switch off entirely.’
England’s now-infamous Noosa trip has received the empathy Ben Stokes was calling for from an unlikely source: Australia captain Steve Smith
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One-sided or not, the people still came
By tea, the crowd had reached 93,442, a record for a match at the MCG, surpassing the 93,013 who watched Australia win the 2015 World Cup final against New Zealand. It clearly hasn’t troubled locals that this series has been one-sided.
At Adelaide, the total audience was 223,638, beating the previous ground record of 199,147, during the 2017-18 Ashes. At Brisbane, 137,152 turned up over four days, behind only 164,727 for the 2006-07 Ashes Test, though that was over five.
Remembering one of the greatest
At 3.50pm, Jackson and Brooke Warne – son and daughter of Shane – joined with Ricky Ponting and Michael Vaughan in doffing their floppy sunhats to the crowd. The time reflected Warne’s Australian Test cap number (350), with the initiative drawing attention to the health stations posted around the MCG, allowing fans to check the health of their heart. Warne died of a heart attack in 2022, aged 52.
