Dear GhanaWeb,
When I met my husband, he was wealthy, and everyone, including him, assumed I was with him for his money. But the truth is, I genuinely loved him. While he was always financially supportive, he was never emotionally, mentally, or psychologically present.
At some point, I wanted to leave, but everyone around me thought I was overreacting. They said I was being unreasonable. I convinced myself that marriage would soften him and make him more attentive toward me, but I was wrong.
Things got worse after we got married. He became even more distant, and I could count the number of times I saw him in a month. He was always around when I gave birth, but after the naming ceremonies, he would disappear again. I used those lonely times to educate myself, grow my business, and find some sense of purpose. I tried speaking to him, but nothing changed.
Eventually, I felt like I was married to myself. There was no romance, no intimacy, no attention—just material things. He spent months traveling and enjoying himself, leaving me behind. One time, after he had been gone for three months, I finally decided to ask for a divorce.
I explained how I felt, making it clear that the decision wasn’t impulsive—it came after much thought, tears, and reflection. I also told him I didn’t want anything from him, except that he remained responsible for our children and stayed involved in their lives.
For the first time, he stayed home that month, but his sudden presence didn’t mean much to me. I had already grown accustomed to living without him, and I wasn’t going to be fooled into believing things would change. Despite everyone trying to talk me out of it, I had made up my mind, and we separated.
Strangely enough, after the separation, he became more attentive than ever. He called constantly, checked up on me, and even showed up unannounced at my house and workplace. One day, I asked him why it had to take our separation for him to start showing care.
He admitted he never believed in true love and thought I married him for his money. Because of this belief, he held back emotionally.
Now, he’s always around, but his constant presence feels suffocating. It’s even cost me a potential relationship during a talking stage. While I once loved him deeply, I’m hurt and disappointed that he doubted my intentions from the start.
What should I do? I want to move on, but his actions keep holding me back. I’m a confused woman right now.
